All things work together

We've been so blessed by the outpouring of love and concern from our friends, and even some strangers, over this past weekend as we shared with all of you our recent challenges with Alan's diagnosis. God has created us for community, and we find such healing and encouragement in the support of others. As God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone." Even Adam's life in a perfect garden with God Himself as a Companion wasn't complete without human fellowship.

But the greatest strength I find is in the promises of God. If that sounds shallow, it is probably because you have not been where we are today. Right now there are promises I want, promises that God doesn't give. I want Him to promise that my husband will not get very sick during treatment, and even more, will recovery quickly and completely. I want promises that God will intervene and take away all unpleasant circumstances.

I don't have those promises.

Instead, though, I have better promises. Promises that God will never leave me or forsake me. Promises that He will not allow more than we can bear. Promises that nothing really bad will happen to our family. Because He has said that He will make all things work together for good to those that love Him.

I can do that!

I don't know how I can possibly handle some of the potential outcomes of this crisis, but I know how to love Him. I know how to trust His promises. God is who He says He is in His Word--I stake my life on it.

So like Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, I feel like we stand before the fiery furnace of affliction. "Our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace....But if not, be it known to you, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the golden image that you have set up.”

Maybe we will be burned by the furnace of affliction. Or maybe God will do something miraculous and prevent that. Either way, God is with us, and we are part of a mighty brotherhood of faith. We don't need circumstances to testify as to whether He is loving and powerful, as He says He is. Some of our "cloud of witnesses" were delivered by chariots of fire; others were beheaded in cold dungeons. All were delivered by God, and all will someday stand together on the Sea of Glass and testify that His grace was sufficient.

There are times my heart fails at the thought of trials that may be ahead. But through everything I have a wonderful peace and absolutely solid assurance: God is going to use this situation to glorify Himself. By that, I don't mean He is a glory hog, or that our suffering is irrelevant to Him. Far from it!

I mean God is going to use this to prove that He is good, and to change us into His image. He is showing the universe that He is love, that His law of love is the best way to rule the universe, and that He can transform even sinful people into His image of selfless love. And even better, He can use any circumstance--even ones that are against His will--to contribute to that process.

 All things DO work together for good, for those who love God and have committed their lives to Him. I know He is coming soon to deliver us from pain and darkness, and to conquer the enemy forever. And trusting that puts everything else in my life into perspective.

A different kind of blog post from the usual

Years ago, I started this blog as a way to keep my mom updated on the amusing happenings in our household (since I couldn't remember them all well enough to tell her on the phone). Over time, she and I told other people about it and it metamorphosed into a window into the Parker household.

Well, it's still a window into our household, but some of the goings-on are likely to surprise you this time. They've certainly surprised us.

So...this post is an update on a new beginning in our lives. Not one we anticipated or would have chosen, but apparently one that God sees can bring blessings to our lives. Trusting that God is a God of love, we believe this new journey will teach us many precious lessons about the character of our faithful God.

Alan decided to write this update in his own words.

Dear Friends,

A number of you have been asking about my health, and we wanted to share publicly what has been happening so we can clarify the rumors and also solicit your prayers.

During the summer, we followed up on some routine blood work that had indicated elevated liver enzymes. The result was shocking. I have hepatitis C, and have likely had it for several decades. For those of you who don’t know much about the disease (as we didn’t), it is a virus that attacks the liver, slowly causing inflammation and scarring. Most people who have it show little to no symptoms and are unaware of the disease for 20 to 30 years. It is not easily transmitted, except through infectious needles or blood. We are not sure exactly when I caught it, as I had both blood transfusions and surgery during my childhood and youth in Africa. Since the virus was only discovered in 1989, transmission through blood transfusions was common.

At the end of the summer, I got a biopsy to determine how far the disease had progressed. Unfortunately, I have stage four liver disease, known as cirrhosis. A normal liver is stage one; an inflamed liver is stage two; a hardening or mild scarring of the liver (known as fibrosis) is stage three. Stage four is when there has been permanent, irreversible scarring of the liver and is the last stage before liver failure. While there are many potential complications, the greatest risk is the development of liver cancer, which occurs in 20% of all cirrhotic patients. Even without cancer, if the virus remains in my system, the condition will likely worsen and I will need a liver transplant.

I don't feel sick. Like most patients with hepatitis C, I don't experience many symptoms. Other than some mild fatigue and insomnia (that we had initially put down to the stress of my accident in March), I feel fine. I have continued to engage in my regular teaching and evangelistic ministry and we could almost fool ourselves that I do not have a potentially life-threatening disease. But the biopsy and test results are clear. Unless we do something, as our specialist put it, there will likely be severe liver complications within five years.

We have been through the cycles of good and bad news. First, we found out that there was medical treatment available that was able to clear the virus from over 80% of patients.  Then we got the bad news that I have the worst type of virus (known as Type 1), which has traditionally only had a 35% success rate. Then there was more good news. In the last two years, new drugs have been made available which have doubled the rate of success for Type 1 patients. Then more bad news, as we found out the potential side effects of treatment were severe, including fevers, fatigue, rashes, anemia, a lowered immunity, depression, nausea and a host of other unpleasant possibilities. About 15% of patients have to stop treatment because they can’t tolerate the side effects.

We have visited three liver specialists and talked to numerous doctors in our friendship network such as Neil Nedley, Mike Hollie and John Chung. It is clear that there are no natural remedies that will kill the virus. While we are taking steps to be as natural and healthy in our diet as possible (and fortunately, we had already been eating a healthy diet), we have no other recourse but to pursue treatment. There’s a danger in posting this publicly, as every person who has found a natural remedy to work for them will try to persuade us to adopt it so that we can fight this disease. We’ve looked into this extensively and we have not found a single person who has been cured of Hepatitis C by natural means.

So while we are convinced that we will do treatment, we are still finalizing what that treatment will be. In October we will see a fourth specialist to consider a clinical trial. There are several new treatments that claim to have better efficacy and less side effects. However, they are not publicly available as they are still being approved by the FDA. We are going to be carefully looking at our options before making a final decision and we hope to start treatment by January. My treatment is expected to last a full year and we will not be able to do any significant travelling or speaking during that time. Our hope is that I will clear the virus within the next year and then begin restoring my liver. We are hopeful that with natural remedies and a healthy lifestyle we can avoid a liver transplant.

  

We would appreciate your prayers as we move ahead. With three young children (who vaguely understand what is happening) and a burgeoning ministry, it is a little scary to face our own mortality. We are planning on an anointing in the next couple of weeks and believe in God’s restorative power (whether by medicine or more miraculous means!) Regardless of the future, we are grateful for your support, and most of all to our loving God, who never allows more than we can bear. We are confident that even though He has not ordained suffering, He uses it as part of His great plan to change us into His image, and to reveal to the universe that sin (not pain) is the enemy. Whatever is ahead, His hand is over our lives, and we trust His loving care.

Alan and Nicole

Oh rats!

We have a rat.

Which, being an optimist, I like to think is better than having seven rats.

Here's our latest acquisition.

The story is, we were working out in our vegetable garden Sunday. (For you Americans, I know "garden" already means "vegetable garden," but for the sake of the Africans/Europeans/etc., we have to specify this.) Now, I love our garden, and having a beautiful garden area was one of the main reasons I fell in love with this house. But gardens come with an unfortunate feature, weeds. This could have a been a manageable phenomenon, but due to circumstances beyond our control (traveling quite a bit, and other things I'll mention sometime), our veggies have been sadly neglected this summer. The garden has bravely fought back and produced an admirable amount of delightful food, but finally the weeds were getting so tall they were going to seed. It was getting difficult to find the food nestled in their depths.

It was time. We vowed to devote Sunday morning to beating back the invaders.

We were blessed by two wonderful surprises: first, our dear friends Zeke Vasquez and Thomas Beihl offered to come help us, and second, the Klingbeil family offered to come help the same morning! We were delighted.

So we launched the assault. It was a huge success! But after an hour of digging, plucking and ripping out what seemed to be miles of weeds (specifically morning glory vines that had taken over the watermelon patch and suffocated everything else), Zeke called to me that something was squeaking under the weeds. With a little effort we located the source of the protests--a nest of pinkish-gray baby rodents!

We guessed at their identity for a little while (moles? mice?) before I saw the mother's head dart out of the weeds. A rat! Argh!

Squealing babies were strewn around under the weeds, but we eventually located six babies (and later a seventh). Mommy Rat amazed us with her courage by coming out from under the weeds, despite the herd of six human children and a few adults scattered a few feet away. She marched across the bare ground and picked up her children, one after another, five times. Marveling at her chutzpah, we let her do her job. (And now we have seven rats somewhere in our back yard. But we're not thinking about that. Well, actually, we are. What were we thinking?! We DO have seven rats! All outside waiting to invade our walls this fall!)

Her mothering instincts were sharp, but apparently other instincts weren't as well-honed, because when she came back for her sixth child, she looked around and wasn't able to locate it. (This was primarily because she was standing on it both times.) Eventually she gave up and disappeared. We found another hapless guy under the bushes soon after, but both were left in the abandoned nest in vain. Either Mom never finished first grade math, or she figured five kids were enough. Can't say I blame her. Whatever the case, one of those two disappeared sometime during the afternoon. When I went back to check around 7 pm, one pitiful baby rat remained. Foolishly I stooped to examine her wee little face.

And we acquired a rat.

In case you can't tell from the picture, said rat is currently the size of my thumb, from the knuckle up only (plus a tail). What you also can't see is that she has a voracious appetite and is getting me up twice a night to eat.

The rat adoption was met by varying degrees of enthusiasm. Needless to say, the kids were thrilled, and all clamored to hold her. Daddy was less warm in his welcome, though (generous as we are) the kids and I allowed him the glorious privilege of naming her. After several of his thoughtful suggestions, Snake Snack, Drat Zadie made her official entrance into the family.

At least, for now.

And no, you're not the only one questioning my sanity. I am myself. Regularly. Especially at 1 am when I am crawling out of bed to feed a rat.

I never thought I'd own a rat. Especially not such an adorable one.

And again I say, rejoice

Skyler has a perennial problem with being afraid of the dark. We've tried all sorts of remedies for this (light on in the hallway or bathroom, singing, praying, listening to Your Story Hour on CD, etc.). Recently we have tried letting him go to sleep holding his tiny orange New Testament in bed with him.

"Mommy," he pleaded one night, "would you pyeeze read something fwom the Bible for me?"

Not wanting to turn on the light, I knelt beside his bed, took his Bible, and opened randomly. Then I began to recite Psalm 23. Since I was doing it from memory, of course it ended up being King James Version.

When I got to "Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death..." I saw his eyes light up with merriment, even through the darkness.

"Mommy," he sputtered in glee. "Why does it say "Yay!" in the Bible?"

Raising little ministry fans

Last week we went to the ASI convention, a once-a-year grand melee of friends, acquaintances and strangers milling about in blissful fellowship. It's also an opportunity for the kids (and me!) to roam the aisles of the exhibit hall, picking up freebie promotional materials from the many booths promoting their ministries there.

The kids' favorite promo this year was hand-held, tiny mechanized fans from It Is Written. They merrily buzzed each other with them and were thrilled with the lights spelling "It Is Written" on the whirring fan blades.

Apparently other ministries had fans, too. After one trip to the exhibit hall, Skyler whispered to me in awe, "Mommy! I saw some other fans, too. They were the kind from ancient times!"

Prayers from the heart

One of my favorite times of day is when the kids pray before hopping into bed. Yes! Silence on the horizon! Here are some of my favorite recent prayers.

"Help people, like the people in Chatta-noo-ga, to love Jesus."

"Help the Christians to not be in prison."

"Help me to be a real friend, who talks to You and reads Your letters, and really, really be Your friend."

"Hep us to be like the dinosaurs. To eat only plants."

Ladies first

This morning in worship, we read about Elijah and Ahab. Afterward, I talked with the kids about the worship of Molech. "Can you imagine if we worshiped Molech? If one morning Daddy and I came downstairs for breakfast and said that something bad is happening to us, and we need to sacrifice one of our children to Molech?"

Three pairs of round eyes stared at me.

"Skyler," I invited, "What if we decided to sacrifice you? You are the littlest, after all. It would be easiest to catch you."

"And what if something else bad happened?" Anaya chimed in. "You might have to sacrifice Sethie next! And then me!"

"Actually, Anaya, since you are a girl, you might be sacrificed first."

Skyler put in his two cents' worth now. "You know that 'girls first' thing, Mommy? I think girls should be sacwificed first."