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Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Screech (or, life from Skyler's perspective)


7:30 Wow, look, it's light in here! I'd better tell everyone! I'm awake, morning has broken, and there are a zillion things to do! Get up, everybody! SCREECH! Hi, Seth! How are things over in your crib? Look, here's Mommy! Yay! I wonder why she always looks sleepy in the morning. I'm not sleepy. Why be sleepy, when I just slept a LOOONG time? I've finished sleeping! I never want to sleep again! Grownups are so weird.

7:35 Mom's strapping me into a high chair. Yay, food! Looks like Mom's mixing up some of that goop with applesauce and cereal. Maybe I can get my hand on the spoon when she's not looking. I know I could feed myself if she would just give me the bowl. And wouldn't THAT be a blast?! I had so much fun with that pasta yesterday. The only problem with feeding myself is that they always try to scrub my face off afterward. I like my face! Why don't they leave it alone?

8:00 No more, no more, I'm stuffed! Let me out! Hey, look, there's a toy car! Hahaha, nobody's got it! Vroom, vroom!

8:05 Here comes Sethie. Oh, no, he wants my CAR! MY car, MINE! I've got to run, run like I've never run before! But he's so fast! There's no hope! He's going to take it! SCREEEEECH! There, Mommy heard me and she's stopping Sethie from his wicked purpose. Hahaha! I love Mommy!

8:07 Look, here's that orange punching balloon! Who cares about a stupid car? This thing is flat, but I know what to do. I saw Mommy blow it up the other day. It turns into a ball! It's the coolest thing! I just need to put this end in my mouth and blow...blow...blow...how come it isn't getting bigger? It's just getting wetter. That's kinda cool, but not what I had in mind. Hmmm. These things are so weird. SCREECH! There, Mommy is coming. Hey, you're taking my balloon! SCREECH! How can you do this to me? It was mine, mine! I had it first! No fair! Mommy, you're so unbearably mean! Oh, wait, she's blowing it up! It's getting bigger! Yay! Me, me, me! I want it! Don't let Sethie have it! Oh, yes, yes, yes, I have it! Look, I can throw it! Hey, don't touch it, Sethie! SCREECH!

8:30 Here's a broom! I love sweeping, love it, love it, love it! Mommy does too, obviously, because she does it all the time. Especially the dining room. She likes to push the Cheerios around. So I do too, before I eat them. I'm getting so big now that I can walk, I'm going to be just like Mommy soon. Only she doesn't eat the Cheerios after she pushes them around. That's silly, in my opinion. Enjoy them in all the ways you can, I say.

8:45 There's Seth with a sippy cup. Hey, I want a drink! In fact, now that I think about it, that's the only thing in the whole world that I want. I want it! I need it! Give it to me! SCREECH! Hahaha, I got it! Hey, quit howling! He's always howling. Oh well--hey, gimme back that sippy cup! SCREECH! Mommy! Seth just stole my sippy cup! Here, if I fall down on the floor and bury my face, you'll see just how intense my anguish is. How can you allow him to keep drinking that when you knows it's MINE? You're so mean, Mommy! This is the ultimate injustice! Life is so unfair! Oh, she's filled one up for me! Yay, my own sippy cup! I love sippy cups! I love Mommy!

9:00 Where's my binky? I want it! I need it! The world isn't as nice as it was when I woke up this morning. How come nobody gives me what I want when I want it? Mommy must know I want it. I'll go hang on her leg. SCREECH!

9:05 Look, Sethie has a doll stroller! Yay! I love strollers! This one makes a great noise and is so much fun to push. I'll go take it from Sethie. Hey, give it to me! How can you do this to me? Don't you know that's the only thing in the whole world I've ever wanted? Gimme! SCREECH! This is so unfair! Everyone in the world is bigger than me! I said GIVE it to me! Aaaaa--oh, look there's another one! Yay! Look out, here I come! I'm so glad I have a brother to chase!

9:10 Did I just hear Mommy say, "bath"? Oh, yay, yay, I love baths! Who cares about strollers? Maybe if I zip in there in time, I can reach in the water from outside the bath, and get my sleeves wet. That is so cool. I wonder if that neat little pool is open. Nope, Mommy closed the lid. Sigh. She always does that. Augh, she's caught me! Well, there go my pajamas! She peels me like she peels a banana (and have I mentioned that those are the most incredible things in the whole world?) and pops me in the water. Yay, this feels great! I love baths! Here comes Sethie! Look, Sethie, can you splash like this? Whee! Let's kick our feet too! Hey, let's throw things out of the bathtub! Where's that cup? Here, I'll throw this, you get the washrag...Uh oh, here comes Mommy with our clothes. Why does she always yell when she comes in the bathroom?

9:20 Hey, gimme that! I wonder where my binky is? How come nobody does what I want them to do? I'm warm, I'm comfy, but I feel grouchy. Hey, why is Mommy taking me out of the bathtub? SCREECH! I hate this! Don't dry me off! Hey, is that my binky? Yay! I love binkies! I love Mommy! Oh, she's dressing me in that adorable "My Parents Are Exhausted" shirt! I like that one! Yay!

9:30 I'm feeling so snuggly, so warm, so...sleepy...Ah, bed at last! It seems like hours since I was in here!

10:30 Whoa, I think I slept a LOOOOONG time! Won't Mommy be excited to see I'm awake? SCREECH! Yay, here she is! First I need a snuggle as we go down the hallway. OK, that's all I'll need of THAT today! Listen, is that music playing? Yay, I love music! My favorite sport is be-bopping to Vivaldi! Sethie and Anaya are already spinning around in the living room. Oh no, they never see me when they spin. I guess I'm below their line of vision. Oh well, maybe this time will be different. Wheeee! Ouch! SCREECH! I'm down here, don't hit me! Wheeee!

10:45 Look what I found, a book! It has bright pictures! I love books! I love pictures! I wonder if the pictures in this book can be pulled out. The ones I found the other day could, but Mommy didn't like that I took them out. I don't know why. I thought it was fun. Grownups are so weird.

11:00 Look, there are plants in the windowsill! Actually, they're the same ones that were there yesterday, but hey, I didn't get my fingers into them yesterday. Maybe I can reach them today. Yay, something new to explore! I think I can reach those green things! Yay! I...can...almost...get...uh oh, here comes Mommy! Sigh. Okay, another day, guys. Someday I'm going to get a good mouthful of you.

11:30 Look, Anaya and Sethie are running up and down the hall yelling! What a fantastic idea! Why do they get all the good ideas? Oh, never mind, I can always join the fun! AAAAAUGH! This is great! I love running! I love yelling! I love doing whatever Sethie and Anaya are doing! So much fun all packed into one moment!

11:35 Hey, look, there's a room at the end of this hallway. Let's go inside! I just remembered, there's another little room off of this one, and in THAT room is that little tiny room with the wet floor! I LOVE that place! That is simply the coolest place in this whole house. Let's stop on the way to see if the pool is open. Nope, Mommy closed the lid again. But look, the tiny wet-floored room is open! Yay! Wet socks! I LOVE wet socks! Let's dance in it! Yay! Oops, I fell down. Hey, my butt is wet. SCREECH! Oh well. Yay, let's chase each other down the hallway again!

11:45 Hey, my socks are cold! Mommy! SCREECH! How come you dressed me in cold socks? You always do that to me! My butt is wet too, but I don't know why. Oh well, I don't have to walk on it, anyway. Thanks for the dry socks, Mommy. Yay! Let's run down the hall again! Anybody have a ball to throw?

11:50 Hey, what are you doing in the kitchen, Mommy? Hey, food! I'm hungry! Hungry hungry hungry! What's for lunch, Mommy? Hey, you're not picking me up! You're not paying attention to me! SCREECH! I wanna see what's up there! Don't you know I'm starving, I'm so hungry, there's nothing else in the entire world I've ever wanted like this. Please! You've got to help me! Mommy! I'm desperate...oh, hey, look, there's a marker cap on the floor! Have you ever seen one of these things? They're the coolest thing in the world! Look, I can fit it on my finger and point it! Yay! I love marker caps!

12:00 Lunchtime! Yay! I love lunch! I'm so hungry! Hey, what is this stuff, sweet potatoes? You fed me this yesterday! Yeah, I KNOW I liked it yesterday, but that was yesterday! You can't feed it to me again! Yuk! SCREECH! I hate sweet potatoes! Why are you doing this to me? I want...something. Something else! What else do you have? Lentil soup with carrots and fresh basil, please. Or some Cheerios. And why are you calling me Screech?

2 comments:

The Falcon said...

This was by far the most entertaining blog I have read in a LONG time. Thanks for a peek into the life of Skyler (and his family!)

Christy said...

that was supposed to be me (christy) writing that comment, not "jeff". lol.